Here Comes the Judge

Hear ye, hear ye This court is now in session His Honor, Judge Pigmeat Markham presidin Hear ye, hear ye, the court of swing It's just about ready to do that thing I don't want no tears, I don't want no lies Above all, I don't want no alibis This Judge is hip, and that ain't all He'll give you time if you're big or small All in line for this court is neat Peace brother, here comes the Judge Here comes the Judge Everybody knows that he is the judge Everybody near or far I'm goin' to Paris to stop this war All those kids gotta listen to me Because I am the judge and you can plainly see I want to big 'round table when I get there I won't sit down to one that's square I want to lay down the law to them that brought it I'll bust some head because I am the judge He is the judge, he is the judge Who's there? I is. I is who? I is your next door neighbor Order in this courtroom, order in this courtroom Judge, your Honorship, Hi sir Did I hear you say "Order in the Court?" Yes I said order in the court Well, I'll take two cans of beer, please He is the judge, he is the judge Everybody knows that he is the judge I had a chat with Ho Chi Min With cheap rice wine and chased with gin Won't take long unless I miss my guess I'll have you out of this doggone mess I sent a cable to Bob and Mac Let them know I'm comin' back Sit right down with Rock and Nick Teach them boys some of Pigmeat's tricks Oh, oh judge, your Honor, Pigmeat said "Don't you remember me??" No, who are you, boy Well, I'm the feller that introduced you To your wife... to my wife? Yeah, life! You son-of-a-gun you Come November, election time You vote your way, I'll vote mine 'Cause there's a tie, and the money gets spent Vote for Pigmeat Markham, President I am the judge, vote for Pigmeat I am the judge, vote for Pigmeat Now, everybody knows I am the judge