You're the Reason Our Kids Are Ugly

You're the reason I'm ridin' 'round on recapped tyres An' you're the reason I'm hangin' our clothes outside on walls An' you're the reason our kids are ugly, little darling Ah, but looks ain't everything And money ain't everything But, I love you just the same You're the reason I changed to beer from soda pop An' you're the reason I never get to go to the beauty shop You're the reason our kids are ugly, little darling Oh, but looks ain't everything And money ain't everything But, I love you just the same I guess that we won't ever have, everything we need 'Cause when we get ahead, it's got another mouth to feed And that's the reason my good looks and my figure's gone And that's the reason I ain't got no hair to comb An' you're the reason our kids are ugly, little darling Ah but looks ain't everything And money ain't everything But, I love you just the same Conway, why in the devil don't you gon' And shave an' put on a clean pair of pants? Loretta, look at yourself I wish you'd take them curlers out of your hair, 'an- An' go put on a little bit of makeup, 'an- An' get out of the housecoat before supper Ha, well let me tell you somethin', Conway Considerin' everything I went through today I look like a movie star Hell, yeah, Ruth Cassidy Thank you Besides that All of our kids took after your part of our family anyway Oh, they did, huh? What about the one's that's bald? Well, I guess you might say they took after me

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