Heard in the following movies & tv shows
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Lyrics
Look at her! A prisoner of the gutter Condemed by every syllable she utters By right, she should be taken out and hung For the cold blooded murder of the English tongue! Heavens! What a sound! This is what the British population Calls an elementary education Did I? Hear them down in Soho square Dropping H's everywhere Speaking English anyway they like Ah, you sir! Did you go to school? What do you "tike" me for, a fool? No one taught him "take" instead of "tike"? Hear a Yorkshire man, or worse! Hear a Cornish man converse I'd rather hear a choir singing flat! Chickens cackling in a barn, just like this one (Gawm!) Gawm! I ask you sir, what sort of word is that? It's "ow" and "gawm" that keep her in her place Not her wretched clothes and dirty face Why can't the English teach their children how to speak? This verbal class distinction by now should be antique! If you spoke as she does sir Instead of the way you do; why you might be selling flowers too! An Englishman's way of speaking absolutley classifies him The moment he talks, he makes some other Englishman dispise him! One common language I'm afraid we'll never get Oh, why can't the English learn to... Set a good example to people whose English is painful to your ears! The Scotch and the Irish leave you close to tears There are even are places where English completely disappears! Well, in America, they haven't used it for years! Why can't the English teach their children how to speak? Norwegians learn Norwegian The Greeks are taught their Greek In France, every Frenchman knows his language from A to Zed The French don' care what they do actually As long as they pronounce it properly Arabians learn Arabian with the speed of summer lightning The Hebrews learn it backwards Which is absolutely frightening Use proper English you're regarded as a freak Oh, Why can't the English... Why can't the English learn to speak?
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